This is my first time.

So here I am writing my first blog.  This is a new experience for me.  Much like being cast in the musical RENT.  Now, being cast in a show is not new to me.  I've been doing shows my whole life.  The theatre is my home and where I am most comfortable and most myself.  However, with RENT, I find myself in a curious dilemma.  Throughout my career, I've learned what my character type is and what roles I can reasonably expect to get based on that.  This formula has never let me down.  Then RENT came along and I got cast as the beautiful gay drag queen who steals the hearts of the audience.  Shit.  For the first time in my career as an actor I find myself wondering, "What the fuck were they thinking?"  Don't get me wrong, I'm THRILLED to have the chance to play this character.  I love the opportunity to play characters as far removed from myself as possible.  However, I find myself struggling with how to approach this.  I'm not even close to the "standard" representation of Angel.  First of all, I'm much older than most, if not all, of my fellow leads.  So I'm trying to figure out how I fit in with all these "kids".  And second, I'm scared that I'll be an ugly ass woman.  I mean, ugly... ass... woman.  Especially after meeting my "love interest" who is a nice looking young man.  Now I'm not a terrible looking guy, but I'm certainly no pretty boy.  Trying to justify why a good looking young man like our "Tom" would be interested in a goofy looking older guy like me is an interesting challenge.  However, I do love a good theatrical challenge.  I trust Jesse's vision and that helps tremendously.  I also have enough experience to know that once I find that storyline that makes a goofy looking old guy like me the perfect Angel, I'm gonna nail that shit.  So, let the journey begin and forgive me if I have a slightly perplexed look along the way.

-The Queen